








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 87 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 46 matches | ||
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1893 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,612 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 961 | 27% |
| Smokes | 593 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1144 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 914 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $466,033 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 133 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JÄtkÄ | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | Copperi | 64% | 56 |
| #3 | Unss1ツ | 62% | 13 |
| #4 | Mr Referee | 60% | 52 |
| #5 | wallejj | 58% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Copperi | 4 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Mr Referee | 4 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | Tex Willer | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | wallejj | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Niko | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Copperi | 254 | 0.25 | 7 min |
| #2 | Tex Willer | 140 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | eräjorma | 128 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #4 | Mr Referee | 111 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Niko | 57 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Copperi | +7.22 | 89 | 74 |
| #2 | wallejj | +3.48 | 87 | 50 |
| #3 | Unss1ツ | +1.23 | 59 | 39 |
| #4 | Tex Willer | +0.69 | 72 | 72 |
| #5 | Ars1 | +0.59 | 67 | 49 |





