










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 39 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
492 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,731 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 454 | 26% |
| Smokes | 565 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 272 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 440 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $119,979 of utility $120 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 38 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ZeNNz^ | 53% | 19 |
| #4 | Xeno | 50% | 4 |
| #5 | ONLY SAFE | 50% | 4 |
| #6 | Chaoo99 | 44% | 9 |
| #7 | krabenz | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ZeNNz^ | 100 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #2 | Chaoo99 | 33 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #3 | xEEf | 30 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #4 | ONLY SAFE | 27 | 0.29 | 1 min |
| #5 | krabenz | 12 | 0.26 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xeno | +1.36 | 77 | 49 |
| #2 | Chaoo99 | +1.13 | 88 | 60 |
| #3 | xEEf | +1.04 | 80 | 68 |
| #4 | Nqtiv | +0.97 | 68 | 62 |
| #5 | ZeNNz^ | +0.76 | 81 | 74 |





