








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 642 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 250 matches | ||
| Wingman | 104 matches | ||
| Faceit | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 88 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




163 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5715 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,379 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 869 | 14% |
| Smokes | 2918 | 46% |
| HE Grenades | 1623 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 969 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,724,484 of utility $224 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 320 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Kat | 59% | 39 |
| #2 | KAPGAN | 57% | 94 |
| #3 | plavo | 47% | 95 |
| #4 | 13zhao | 46% | 39 |
| #5 | ThunderThighs | 44% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | plavo | 47% | 95 |
| #4 | 13zhao | 46% | 39 |
| #5 | ThunderThighs | 44% | 41 |
| #6 | 9bit | 43% | 98 |
| #7 | BIGUZRA | 36% | 58 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | plavo | 20 | 0.0103 |
| #2 | ThunderThighs | 13 | 0.0168 |
| #3 | 9bit | 11 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | 13zhao | 5 | 0.0061 |
| #5 | KAPGAN | 3 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | plavo | 409 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #2 | 9bit | 237 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #3 | ✪ Kat | 108 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #4 | KAPGAN | 82 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | BIGUZRA | 80 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 9bit | +5.29 | 89 | 64 |
| #2 | KAPGAN | +2.35 | 58 | 50 |
| #3 | ✪ Kat | +2.07 | 76 | 57 |
| #4 | ImmuneLethal | +1.36 | 69 | 31 |
| #5 | 13zhao | +0.79 | 85 | 39 |





