








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 306 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 196 matches | ||
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3572 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,211 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2449 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2886 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3700 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 3176 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $942,718 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 737 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DoppelP | 64% | 50 |
| #2 | .KLANTE_only | 61% | 57 |
| #3 | HeldVomKiwiFeld | 59% | 46 |
| #4 | 3amo ADRN | 59% | 29 |
| #5 | AJM | 58% | 143 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | 3amo ADRN | 59% | 29 |
| #5 | AJM | 58% | 143 |
| #6 | botleex | 56% | 27 |
| #7 | friDaN- | 46% | 28 |
| #8 | priestaR | 39% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AJM | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #2 | .KLANTE_only | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | friDaN- | 3 | 0.0051 |
| #4 | botleex | 2 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | priestaR | 1 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AJM | 347 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #2 | HeldVomKiwiFeld | 178 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | .KLANTE_only | 111 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | DoppelP | 100 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | priestaR | 90 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | botleex | +2.57 | 70 | 58 |
| #2 | friDaN- | +1.39 | 82 | 64 |
| #3 | George4612 | +1.38 | 79 | 62 |
| #4 | .KLANTE_only | +0.89 | 77 | 67 |
| #5 | HeldVomKiwiFeld | +0.86 | 88 | 67 |





