










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 209 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
589 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 974 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 246 | 25% |
| Smokes | 286 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 275 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 167 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $609,620 of utility $245 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 153 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Thank's Rayden | 39% | 79 |
| #2 | Cigarette Enthusiast | 36% | 11 |
| #3 | /Blatant <3 | 33% | 48 |
| #4 | what, who eats a mound's bar | 31% | 64 |
| #5 | boy | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Cigarette Enthusiast | 36% | 11 |
| #3 | /Blatant <3 | 33% | 48 |
| #4 | what, who eats a mound's bar | 31% | 64 |
| #5 | boy | 25% | 8 |
| #6 | Delta | 13% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | /Blatant <3 | 30 | 0.0309 |
| #2 | Thank's Rayden | 18 | 0.0116 |
| #3 | what, who eats a mound's bar | 11 | 0.0090 |
| #4 | Cigarette Enthusiast | 1 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | boy | 52 | 0.31 | 1 min |
| #2 | /Blatant <3 | 49 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #3 | what, who eats a mound's bar | 46 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #4 | Thank's Rayden | 35 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #5 | Cigarette Enthusiast | 20 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | boy | +8.63 | 92 | 68 |
| #2 | Thank's Rayden | +3.05 | 49 | 7 |
| #3 | /Blatant <3 | +2.64 | 66 | 26 |
| #4 | Cigarette Enthusiast | +2.31 | 89 | 41 |
| #5 | Thank's Tom | -3.19 | 22 | 26 |





