








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 199 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 85 matches | ||
| Faceit | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 66 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3183 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,142 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3380 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3148 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2113 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2501 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $797,293 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 517 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Number4 | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | 𝕃𝕖𝕊𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕖 | 61% | 28 |
| #3 | 𝚃𝚑𝚊ï 𝙼𝚒𝚗𝚐 | 60% | 20 |
| #4 | POLOT | 58% | 67 |
| #5 | SkyGodLucky | 53% | 78 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | POLOT | 325 | 0.24 | 8 min |
| #2 | seem | 308 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #3 | 𝚃𝚑𝚊ï 𝙼𝚒𝚗𝚐 | 257 | 0.60 | 7 min |
| #4 | SkyGodLucky | 76 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | 𝕃𝕖𝕊𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕖 | 71 | 0.13 | 2 min |





