








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 134 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1209 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,691 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1542 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1293 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1579 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1277 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $187,077 of utility $47 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 79 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ibo | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | Tontsa.dll | 57% | 86 |
| #3 | Pukki | 57% | 37 |
| #4 | Sheep | 53% | 118 |
| #5 | SusAnna | 50% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ibo | 63% | 19 |
| #2 | Tontsa.dll | 57% | 86 |
| #3 | Pukki | 57% | 37 |
| #4 | Sheep | 53% | 118 |
| #5 | SusAnna | 50% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SusAnna | 11 | 0.0050 |
| #2 | Tontsa.dll | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Sheep | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #4 | Pukki | 1 | 0.0013 |
| #5 | Ibo | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tontsa.dll | 550 | 0.31 | 14 min |
| #2 | Sheep | 278 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #3 | SusAnna | 189 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Ibo | 46 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #5 | Pukki | 20 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tontsa.dll | +2.90 | 51 | 58 |
| #2 | Ibo | +2.55 | 79 | 65 |
| #3 | Pukki | +0.36 | 55 | 14 |
| #4 | Sheep | -0.11 | 36 | 57 |
| #5 | SusAnna | -0.24 | 52 | 41 |





