








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 100 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 82 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1308 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,125 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 906 | 22% |
| Smokes | 993 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 921 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1305 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $302,609 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 90 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zigmunds III Autobānis | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | -nubix | 73% | 11 |
| #3 | khelix | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | samo. | 64% | 14 |
| #5 | Vizio | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zigmunds III Autobānis | 75% | 12 |
| #2 | -nubix | 73% | 11 |
| #3 | khelix | 70% | 10 |
| #4 | samo. | 64% | 14 |
| #5 | Vizio | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zigmunds III Autobānis | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zigmunds III Autobānis | 28 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #2 | khelix | 24 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | Vizio | 18 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| #4 | samo. | 13 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | -nubix | 13 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | khelix | +3.46 | 70 | 69 |
| #2 | Vizio | +2.24 | 88 | 76 |
| #3 | -nubix | +1.39 | 86 | 66 |
| #4 | Zigmunds III Autobānis | +0.58 | 83 | 41 |
| #5 | Reweret | +0.48 | 76 | 59 |





