








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 315 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 108 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 78 matches | ||
| Premier | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4847 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,064 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5157 | 37% |
| Smokes | 3899 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2479 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 2529 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $861,009 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 167 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BurtikBertik | 68% | 22 |
| #2 | TKKKK | 61% | 28 |
| #3 | Cya | 59% | 209 |
| #4 | Slaeer | 58% | 126 |
| #5 | zbyndik | 54% | 79 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Cya | 59% | 209 |
| #4 | Slaeer | 58% | 126 |
| #5 | zbyndik | 54% | 79 |
| #6 | $ISSYBOYDURDEN | 54% | 85 |
| #7 | Happy Miata | 41% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slaeer | 13 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | Cya | 11 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | zbyndik | 4 | 0.0027 |
| #4 | $ISSYBOYDURDEN | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | TKKKK | 3 | 0.0053 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cya | 426 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #2 | Slaeer | 360 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| #3 | $ISSYBOYDURDEN | 211 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | zbyndik | 170 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #5 | BurtikBertik | 90 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cya | +3.64 | 94 | 66 |
| #2 | Chcankopták | +2.89 | 75 | 66 |
| #3 | BurtikBertik | +1.76 | 82 | 68 |
| #4 | $ISSYBOYDURDEN | +1.16 | 66 | 59 |
| #5 | TKKKK | +0.54 | 63 | 72 |





