








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 259 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 256 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 110 matches | ||
| Wingman | 92 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




74 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4875 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,653 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1774 | 18% |
| Smokes | 1827 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2249 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3803 | 39% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,318,826 of utility $173 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 301 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ArcticYummy | 49% | 274 |
| #2 | Eestu | 47% | 215 |
| #3 | muffinssi | 47% | 273 |
| #4 | kaL^s | 47% | 273 |
| #5 | Pyrdi | 45% | 498 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ArcticYummy | 49% | 274 |
| #2 | Eestu | 47% | 215 |
| #3 | muffinssi | 47% | 273 |
| #4 | kaL^s | 47% | 273 |
| #5 | Pyrdi | 45% | 498 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | muffinssi | 35 | 0.0064 |
| #2 | Pyrdi | 21 | 0.0022 |
| #3 | ArcticYummy | 9 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | Eestu | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | kaL^s | 6 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pyrdi | 3247 | 0.34 | 99 min |
| #2 | kaL^s | 1232 | 0.22 | 38 min |
| #3 | muffinssi | 1231 | 0.22 | 34 min |
| #4 | Eestu | 1070 | 0.24 | 31 min |
| #5 | ArcticYummy | 933 | 0.17 | 27 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eestu | +4.23 | 86 | 70 |
| #2 | kaL^s | +2.07 | 74 | 71 |
| #3 | Pyrdi | +0.69 | 43 | 73 |
| #4 | ArcticYummy | +0.05 | 44 | 68 |
| #5 | muffinssi | -0.86 | 52 | 57 |





