








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 257 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Faceit | 81 matches | ||
| Wingman | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2038 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,047 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2221 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1760 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2714 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1352 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,008,241 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1274 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | amisaksu | 65% | 37 |
| #2 | Teme | 57% | 172 |
| #3 | Rontti | 53% | 49 |
| #4 | Pena Diisseli | 50% | 204 |
| #5 | Maitomies | 43% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Teme | 57% | 172 |
| #3 | Rontti | 53% | 49 |
| #4 | Pena Diisseli | 50% | 204 |
| #5 | Maitomies | 43% | 28 |
| #6 | Anttis, | 31% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Teme | 28 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | Pena Diisseli | 12 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Maitomies | 4 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | Rontti | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | amisaksu | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Teme | 583 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #2 | Pena Diisseli | 370 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | Anttis, | 86 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | amisaksu | 70 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Maitomies | 45 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | amisaksu | +4.23 | 81 | 48 |
| #2 | Teme | +1.43 | 32 | 67 |
| #3 | Pena Diisseli | +1.06 | 67 | 42 |
| #4 | Maitomies | -0.02 | 75 | 29 |
| #5 | Rontti | -0.26 | 43 | 41 |





