








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 389 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 19 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1618 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,724 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1521 | 32% |
| Smokes | 995 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 1355 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 853 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $225,809 of utility $78 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 175 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | d0ppies @enterlan'25 | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | DJ | 57% | 21 |
| #3 | domstv@enterlan | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | 💎NocTurN | 53% | 34 |
| #5 | Lag_4th | 50% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | DJ | 57% | 21 |
| #3 | domstv@enterlan | 57% | 23 |
| #4 | 💎NocTurN | 53% | 34 |
| #5 | Lag_4th | 50% | 20 |
| #6 | SempZ | 43% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SempZ | 4 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | domstv@enterlan | 3 | 0.0063 |
| #3 | 💎NocTurN | 2 | 0.0029 |
| #4 | Lag_4th | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | DJ | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SempZ | 90 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #2 | domstv@enterlan | 79 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #3 | 💎NocTurN | 45 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #4 | Lag_4th | 25 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | d0ppies @enterlan'25 | 25 | 0.15 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♕Donny♕{NewInverter} | +3.40 | 66 | 58 |
| #2 | d0ppies @enterlan'25 | +2.59 | 90 | 48 |
| #3 | 💎NocTurN | +0.94 | 72 | 65 |
| #4 | DJ | +0.72 | 63 | 55 |
| #5 | SempZ | -0.10 | 64 | 44 |





