








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 819 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 181 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 94 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2551 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,708 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1457 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1665 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1905 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 1681 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,446,962 of utility $279 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 88 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝕰𝖒𝖒𝖆♛ | 81% | 26 |
| #2 | 乡DEKLES乡 | 60% | 72 |
| #3 | Amorek | 56% | 125 |
| #4 | regis | 53% | 15 |
| #5 | GarryLeeCZ | 53% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | HoppiK | 47% | 45 |
| #12 | LouCeK | 44% | 16 |
| #13 | Rokracek | 42% | 24 |
| #14 | H | 41% | 17 |
| #15 | Fíkus | 40% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fíkus | 4 | 0.0046 |
| #2 | Šebi_Patrik | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #3 | H | 3 | 0.0075 |
| #4 | GarryLeeCZ | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #5 | 乡DEKLES乡 | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Šebi_Patrik | 145 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | 乡DEKLES乡 | 132 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Fíkus | 127 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #4 | GarryLeeCZ | 107 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | Hobojas | 85 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | H | +3.18 | 85 | 64 |
| #2 | Vandy | +1.91 | 79 | 70 |
| #3 | regis | +1.90 | 70 | 74 |
| #4 | HoppiK | +1.54 | 49 | 65 |
| #5 | Hobojas | +0.95 | 48 | 66 |





