








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 471 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 326 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Renown | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4558 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,046 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4570 | 30% |
| Smokes | 3936 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2864 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 3676 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $845,982 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 684 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tusek | 67% | 60 |
| #2 | wasted-- | 65% | 26 |
| #3 | do jet | 65% | 23 |
| #4 | Etna | 65% | 20 |
| #5 | IsuS^ | 64% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dzimi Hendrik | 5 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | xx44pp4422 | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | mdbk | 1 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dzimi Hendrik | 1839 | 0.26 | 44 min |
| #2 | Exile | 164 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | tusek | 137 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | 🦍🦍 | 106 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | Etna | 91 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mdbk | +3.86 | 90 | 62 |
| #2 | satoru | +1.96 | 88 | 65 |
| #3 | tusek | +1.18 | 70 | 56 |
| #4 | Dzimi Hendrik | +1.04 | 75 | 72 |
| #5 | xx44pp4422 | +0.68 | 72 | 56 |





