








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1090 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 257 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




56 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2970 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,219 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3230 | 32% |
| Smokes | 2865 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2012 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2112 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,252,448 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1010 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | AnimeIsWrong | 44% | 62 |
| #6 | SHRIMPLE | 38% | 26 |
| #7 | | 38% | 34 |
| #8 | Arkodia | 32% | 79 |
| #9 | ricky d | 30% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ricky d | 22 | 0.0163 |
| #2 | | 19 | 0.0277 |
| #3 | Arkodia | 16 | 0.0101 |
| #4 | AnimeIsWrong | 15 | 0.0126 |
| #5 | Achalous | 7 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ricky d | 226 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #2 | Arkodia | 93 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | Bartlett | 87 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #4 | Achalous | 83 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | AnimeIsWrong | 79 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Achalous | +5.52 | 76 | 36 |
| #2 | Arkodia | +0.50 | 72 | 45 |
| #3 | SHRIMPLE | +0.40 | 48 | 39 |
| #4 | ricky d | -0.04 | 46 | 35 |
| #5 | NotMrProtato | -0.09 | 58 | 55 |





