








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 777 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 283 matches | ||
| Premier | 51 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2606 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,541 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2194 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2461 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2375 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2511 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,598,600 of utility $195 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1695 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Biotic | 66% | 41 |
| #2 | Krzyz | 64% | 25 |
| #3 | BeastLeor | 63% | 73 |
| #4 | Incipiens | 63% | 129 |
| #5 | ryAn | 62% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | Nacho | 58% | 69 |
| #11 | Br0ken | 50% | 66 |
| #12 | Ghasts | 47% | 123 |
| #13 | Fearsome | 47% | 75 |
| #14 | CompleX | 44% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ghasts | 27 | 0.0105 |
| #2 | Nacho | 15 | 0.0105 |
| #3 | Fearsome | 6 | 0.0039 |
| #4 | Incipiens | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #5 | Biotic | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mantissa | 400 | 0.19 | 13 min |
| #2 | Ghasts | 223 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | Nacho | 208 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | Br0ken | 194 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #5 | Fearsome | 178 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nacho | +5.98 | 85 | 59 |
| #2 | Incipiens | +2.87 | 61 | 69 |
| #3 | Mantissa | +1.79 | 61 | 81 |
| #4 | Krzyz | +1.56 | 81 | 65 |
| #5 | Electro | +1.05 | 67 | 68 |





