








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 944 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 229 matches | ||
| Esplay | 12 matches | 1,400 | |
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3129 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,553 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 279 | 11% |
| Smokes | 585 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1244 | 49% |
| Molotovs | 445 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,569,282 of utility $251 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2209 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kebab raggarn | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | Johnny Bullzeye | 65% | 17 |
| #3 | Roger Ragequit | 50% | 18 |
| #4 | Höglund | 50% | 24 |
| #5 | Zoe C | 48% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ٴ | 20 | 0.0150 |
| #2 | Höglund | 15 | 0.0298 |
| #3 | E. | 14 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | HEDVIG SJÖDIN | 12 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | CS suger kuk | 12 | 0.0359 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kebab raggarn | +3.24 | 68 | 64 |
| #2 | SigmaSlagarn | +3.04 | 63 | 25 |
| #3 | Flygande jävla pungkulan | +2.46 | 72 | 20 |
| #4 | Johnny Bullzeye | +1.31 | 61 | 59 |
| #5 | tratten042 | +1.31 | 40 | 45 |





