








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 778 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 473 matches | ||
| Faceit | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 74 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




66 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7041 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,411 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6062 | 28% |
| Smokes | 5738 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5103 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4508 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,171,768 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1202 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tumps | 56% | 36 |
| #2 | toots1ke | 53% | 100 |
| #3 | Jaakster | 50% | 105 |
| #4 | Vex | 45% | 172 |
| #5 | TaKz | 44% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Vex | 45% | 172 |
| #5 | TaKz | 44% | 36 |
| #6 | UuGaBuUgA | 41% | 74 |
| #7 | Villu | 40% | 52 |
| #8 | Duudels CSGOROLL.COM | 31% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vex | 30 | 0.0082 |
| #2 | Duudels CSGOROLL.COM | 18 | 0.0236 |
| #3 | UuGaBuUgA | 9 | 0.0057 |
| #4 | toots1ke | 8 | 0.0038 |
| #5 | Jaakster | 6 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | toots1ke | 226 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #2 | Vex | 153 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #3 | Tumps | 116 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| #4 | UuGaBuUgA | 106 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #5 | Jaakster | 102 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TaKz | +2.76 | 65 | 50 |
| #2 | Villu | +2.49 | 72 | 54 |
| #3 | Jaakster | -0.08 | 64 | 61 |
| #4 | Duudels CSGOROLL.COM | -0.42 | 65 | 63 |
| #5 | Vex | -0.45 | 42 | 38 |





