








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 994 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 394 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3637 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 20,254 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7578 | 37% |
| Smokes | 6039 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 2221 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 4416 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,500,019 of utility $162 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 541 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tross | 56% | 162 |
| #2 | Slammer | 54% | 154 |
| #3 | .Ernie` | 53% | 96 |
| #4 | Apps in | 51% | 98 |
| #5 | Twisted | 50% | 142 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tross | 14 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | Slammer | 9 | 0.0028 |
| #3 | Twisted | 9 | 0.0031 |
| #4 | Apps in | 6 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | conzz. | 4 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Slammer | 380 | 0.12 | 9 min |
| #2 | IOExceptional | 337 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #3 | Tross | 332 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #4 | Twisted | 300 | 0.10 | 7 min |
| #5 | Apps in | 298 | 0.15 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tross | +1.71 | 67 | 62 |
| #2 | Azureks | +1.36 | 81 | 52 |
| #3 | conzz. | +1.28 | 71 | 46 |
| #4 | Apps in | +0.80 | 55 | 63 |
| #5 | Not Found | +0.71 | 58 | 61 |





