








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 185 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 48 matches | ||
| Faceit | 28 matches | ||
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




43 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1115 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,430 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 810 | 24% |
| Smokes | 796 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1042 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 782 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $300,199 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 18 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [Delta]Ratata-=[D]z=- | 57% | 82 |
| #2 | 彡★GaliLoS★M&M | 55% | 58 |
| #3 | KindeR | 50% | 26 |
| #4 | Bob the Nailer | 49% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [Delta]Ratata-=[D]z=- | 57% | 82 |
| #2 | 彡★GaliLoS★M&M | 55% | 58 |
| #3 | KindeR | 50% | 26 |
| #4 | Bob the Nailer | 49% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [Delta]Ratata-=[D]z=- | 21 | 0.0129 |
| #2 | 彡★GaliLoS★M&M | 13 | 0.0107 |
| #3 | Bob the Nailer | 9 | 0.0118 |
| #4 | KindeR | 2 | 0.0037 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [Delta]Ratata-=[D]z=- | 290 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | 彡★GaliLoS★M&M | 174 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #3 | Bob the Nailer | 128 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | KindeR | 30 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [Delta]Ratata-=[D]z=- | +3.88 | 87 | 74 |
| #2 | KindeR | +0.87 | 51 | 53 |
| #3 | 『HM』⚡ 乃ε𝖓é? #HSKіng (҂`_´) ..! | -0.08 | 63 | 62 |
| #4 | Bob the Nailer | -0.73 | 27 | 59 |
| #5 | 彡★GaliLoS★M&M | -0.89 | 72 | 58 |





