








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
366 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 652 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 303 | 46% |
| Smokes | 50 | 8% |
| HE Grenades | 149 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 150 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $90,217 of utility $64 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | catfindsaleaf.webm | 50% | 10 |
| #2 | HeHeHeHa | 26% | 34 |
| #3 | BrklyPoPtartz | 17% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | catfindsaleaf.webm | 50% | 10 |
| #2 | HeHeHeHa | 26% | 34 |
| #3 | BrklyPoPtartz | 17% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BrklyPoPtartz | 6 | 0.0059 |
| #2 | HeHeHeHa | 4 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | catfindsaleaf.webm | 4 | 0.0201 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BrklyPoPtartz | 40 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #2 | HeHeHeHa | 23 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | catfindsaleaf.webm | +5.72 | 84 | 13 |
| #2 | SoySaucy | -3.30 | 44 | 26 |
| #3 | HeHeHeHa | -4.33 | 27 | 16 |
| #4 | BrklyPoPtartz | -6.68 | 10 | 21 |





