








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 634 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 148 matches | ||
| Premier | 74 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3039 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,498 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2523 | 30% |
| Smokes | 2372 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1584 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 2019 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $720,423 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 101 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kr1zzler | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | 入ってくる | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | Killerboy420 | 61% | 87 |
| #4 | 999-† dm for coaching 1 on 1 | 60% | 20 |
| #5 | leppar :) | 60% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | leppar :) | 60% | 65 |
| #6 | Chops | 60% | 95 |
| #7 | El cripo | 59% | 29 |
| #8 | El Patron//A.Muld | 50% | 20 |
| #9 | rakuu | 46% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Patron//A.Muld | 16 | 0.0392 |
| #2 | rakuu | 3 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Kr1zzler | 3 | 0.0083 |
| #4 | Killerboy420 | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | leppar :) | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chops | 336 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #2 | leppar :) | 186 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #3 | Killerboy420 | 181 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #4 | rakuu | 137 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | El Patron//A.Muld | 81 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 999-† dm for coaching 1 on 1 | +3.83 | 85 | 64 |
| #2 | 入ってくる | +2.05 | 82 | 63 |
| #3 | Killerboy420 | +1.66 | 84 | 60 |
| #4 | leppar :) | +1.59 | 69 | 76 |
| #5 | Sr1ft | +1.35 | 75 | 60 |





