








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 299 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 778 matches | ||
| Wingman | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




72 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6315 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,955 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9065 | 28% |
| Smokes | 7223 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 8985 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 7682 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,865,860 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Alentejano6R | 56% | 71 |
| #2 | Shut_Up | 50% | 98 |
| #3 | 卩IЯΣƧ | 49% | 141 |
| #4 | Sem Patrão | 47% | 137 |
| #5 | ツ bYt0 | 46% | 252 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Sem Patrão | 47% | 137 |
| #5 | ツ bYt0 | 46% | 252 |
| #6 | ][PalmA][ | 46% | 89 |
| #7 | Catoto_pt | 46% | 200 |
| #8 | B0r0♥ | 44% | 124 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ bYt0 | 22 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | Catoto_pt | 10 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | B0r0♥ | 8 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Shut_Up | 8 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | 卩IЯΣƧ | 7 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ツ bYt0 | 802 | 0.15 | 17 min |
| #2 | B0r0♥ | 413 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #3 | 卩IЯΣƧ | 378 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #4 | Catoto_pt | 217 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #5 | Sem Patrão | 210 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shut_Up | +5.95 | 83 | 67 |
| #2 | Alentejano6R | +4.82 | 80 | 64 |
| #3 | B0r0♥ | +0.95 | 56 | 57 |
| #4 | Sem Patrão | -0.29 | 40 | 61 |
| #5 | ツ bYt0 | -0.39 | 31 | 56 |





