








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1791 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 887 matches | ||
| Wingman | 304 matches | ||
| Faceit | 130 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




113 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
15849 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 33,152 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8086 | 24% |
| Smokes | 7499 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 9187 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 8380 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $4,773,462 of utility $168 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1355 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | el´Klappstuhl | 56% | 78 |
| #2 | DannyӃ ۵ | 56% | 103 |
| #3 | Oni | 52% | 90 |
| #4 | FLReapZz | 52% | 289 |
| #5 | EisTee | 51% | 210 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SchurkeMitGurke9 | 46 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | Akira Yuki Uwu | 18 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | Oni | 15 | 0.0076 |
| #4 | DannyӃ ۵ | 14 | 0.0062 |
| #5 | FLReapZz | 12 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SchurkeMitGurke9 | 530 | 0.05 | 10 min |
| #2 | m0rtiPEEK | 466 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| #3 | Akira Yuki Uwu | 425 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #4 | FLReapZz | 326 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| #5 | EisTee | 295 | 0.07 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DannyӃ ۵ | +3.17 | 87 | 62 |
| #2 | CatDestroyer88 | +1.82 | 90 | 53 |
| #3 | Oni | +0.40 | 66 | 57 |
| #4 | dvesi | +0.01 | 79 | 44 |
| #5 | FLReapZz | -0.01 | 77 | 49 |





