








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 163 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 132 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 24 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2098 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,358 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2136 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2278 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2263 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2681 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $728,093 of utility $106 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 654 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | MDC 医者 | 42% | 19 |
| #6 | Donta1123 | 40% | 256 |
| #7 | IceyyBoi | 38% | 32 |
| #8 | ♦Kingly♦ | 30% | 46 |
| #9 | PierceB | 26% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Donta1123 | 12 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Yeager | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | GodMaChin | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | PierceB | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | SCP | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GodMaChin | 641 | 0.22 | 16 min |
| #2 | Donta1123 | 550 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #3 | Yeager | 221 | 0.19 | 5 min |
| #4 | SCP | 171 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #5 | PierceB | 140 | 0.11 | 4 min |





