








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 414 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1316 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,041 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1506 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1016 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 656 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 863 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $255,068 of utility $117 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 125 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nigh_Flasher | 71% | 14 |
| #2 | Womble | 68% | 19 |
| #3 | Monkey D. Luffy | 64% | 14 |
| #4 | Kōrinomizu | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Hot_Shot | 56% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Hot_Shot | 56% | 16 |
| #6 | addd | 50% | 8 |
| #7 | || KENJA || | 49% | 63 |
| #8 | v1k | 42% | 12 |
| #9 | >synchron!ze. | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | || KENJA || | 6 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | v1k | 3 | 0.0119 |
| #3 | Hot_Shot | 2 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | Womble | 1 | 0.0027 |
| #5 | Nigh_Flasher | 1 | 0.0035 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | || KENJA || | 348 | 0.28 | 8 min |
| #2 | Womble | 56 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #3 | addd | 28 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | Hot_Shot | 22 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | Monkey D. Luffy | 20 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Devvv | +2.10 | 93 | 63 |
| #2 | || KENJA || | +1.76 | 87 | 55 |
| #3 | Kōrinomizu | +1.37 | 79 | 46 |
| #4 | addd | +1.07 | 76 | 67 |
| #5 | >synchron!ze. | +0.92 | 76 | 49 |





