










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 151 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2133 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,346 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1959 | 37% |
| Smokes | 1352 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 537 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 1498 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,148,564 of utility $296 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 480 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MarshBelloh | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | Sir-Pickle | 53% | 66 |
| #3 | Tamaleking | 49% | 150 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MarshBelloh | 59% | 17 |
| #2 | Sir-Pickle | 53% | 66 |
| #3 | Tamaleking | 49% | 150 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tamaleking | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | Sir-Pickle | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | MarshBelloh | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sir-Pickle | 136 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #2 | Tamaleking | 76 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #3 | MarshBelloh | 19 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MarshBelloh | +4.31 | 56 | 42 |
| #2 | ProxxiJ | +2.59 | 65 | 56 |
| #3 | Tamaleking | -1.14 | 39 | 24 |
| #4 | Sir-Pickle | -2.44 | 28 | 51 |





