








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 93 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 388 matches | ||
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




35 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3700 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,391 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1560 | 10% |
| Smokes | 4753 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 4058 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 5020 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,088,183 of utility $102 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 152 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kissankuono | 64% | 47 |
| #2 | 8d | 54% | 35 |
| #3 | Svärdeツ | 52% | 56 |
| #4 | Tehosekoin | 50% | 52 |
| #5 | Rosmo | 50% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Svärdeツ | 52% | 56 |
| #4 | Tehosekoin | 50% | 52 |
| #5 | Rosmo | 50% | 54 |
| #6 | mate 유 | 48% | 62 |
| #7 | ossi<3 | 46% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ossi<3 | 11 | 0.0191 |
| #2 | Rosmo | 10 | 0.0090 |
| #3 | mate 유 | 9 | 0.0072 |
| #4 | Tehosekoin | 4 | 0.0035 |
| #5 | Svärdeツ | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Svärdeツ | 280 | 0.23 | 8 min |
| #2 | Rosmo | 249 | 0.22 | 8 min |
| #3 | 8d | 137 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | mate 유 | 119 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #5 | Kissankuono | 118 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ossi<3 | +2.72 | 86 | 47 |
| #2 | 8d | +2.09 | 66 | 54 |
| #3 | Kissankuono | +1.96 | 82 | 56 |
| #4 | Rosmo | +1.47 | 83 | 74 |
| #5 | mate 유 | +1.02 | 81 | 59 |





