








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 972 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 384 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 50 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3945 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,123 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5154 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4157 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2634 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 4178 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,073,460 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 460 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ladiesman217 | 62% | 39 |
| #2 | RusticZ | 54% | 39 |
| #3 | Ja oom | 53% | 62 |
| #4 | SilverValley | 50% | 62 |
| #5 | ares- | 49% | 140 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | ares- | 49% | 140 |
| #6 | [Z0N£]The_Zodiac | 49% | 37 |
| #7 | [Z0N£] Thabo | 49% | 103 |
| #8 | .s1lent | 47% | 64 |
| #9 | PegaSus | 39% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ares- | 23 | 0.0080 |
| #2 | SilverValley | 15 | 0.0118 |
| #3 | .s1lent | 9 | 0.0067 |
| #4 | [Z0N£] Thabo | 4 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Ladiesman217 | 4 | 0.0049 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [Z0N£] Thabo | 488 | 0.23 | 13 min |
| #2 | ares- | 430 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #3 | .s1lent | 206 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | SilverValley | 146 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Ladiesman217 | 87 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PegaSus | +2.50 | 77 | 51 |
| #2 | [Z0N£] Thabo | +0.81 | 65 | 68 |
| #3 | RusticZ | +0.78 | 58 | 51 |
| #4 | JunkyNinja™ | +0.73 | 67 | 69 |
| #5 | Ladiesman217 | +0.47 | 61 | 56 |





