








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 668 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 155 matches | ||
| Esplay | 35 matches | 1,901 | |
| Faceit | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2410 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,700 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2102 | 31% |
| Smokes | 1534 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1489 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 1575 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,466,372 of utility $275 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 50 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fubbu | 53% | 19 |
| #2 | Stray | 48% | 132 |
| #3 | Solheim | 47% | 68 |
| #4 | plutta | 46% | 69 |
| #5 | sANDY | 45% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Solheim | 47% | 68 |
| #4 | plutta | 46% | 69 |
| #5 | sANDY | 45% | 51 |
| #6 | Danbran | 45% | 110 |
| #7 | Mikki | 42% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | plutta | 3 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Solheim | 3 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | Stray | 2 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | sANDY | 1 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | Mikki | 1 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stray | 409 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #2 | Danbran | 334 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #3 | sANDY | 234 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #4 | plutta | 230 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #5 | Solheim | 228 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stray | +1.97 | 66 | 73 |
| #2 | Danbran | +0.61 | 47 | 70 |
| #3 | Fubbu | +0.19 | 60 | 67 |
| #4 | sANDY | -0.69 | 55 | 73 |
| #5 | visizki | -0.91 | 67 | 57 |





