








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 107 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 41 matches | ||
| Faceit | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
627 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,330 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 925 | 21% |
| Smokes | 1329 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 886 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1190 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $664,934 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 632 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kakeake | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | babr | 43% | 47 |
| #3 | Gheton kultapoju | 38% | 78 |
| #4 | Herkko | 38% | 113 |
| #5 | Яромир Лагер | 37% | 136 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Herkko | 5 | 0.0021 |
| #2 | Gheton kultapoju | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | BOT Cabe | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #4 | babr | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #5 | Яромир Лагер | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Яромир Лагер | 575 | 0.20 | 20 min |
| #2 | BOT Cabe | 331 | 0.19 | 10 min |
| #3 | Herkko | 318 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #4 | babr | 211 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #5 | Gheton kultapoju | 162 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | babr | +2.40 | 82 | 69 |
| #2 | Яромир Лагер | +1.80 | 45 | 72 |
| #3 | flc/t/ | +0.68 | 60 | 67 |
| #4 | Herkko | +0.20 | 65 | 55 |
| #5 | Gheton kultapoju | -0.19 | 66 | 54 |





