








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 780 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Premier | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 111 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2060 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,063 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2018 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1991 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 729 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 2325 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $864,652 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 565 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ghosly | 62% | 78 |
| #2 | Yoisaki Kanade | 50% | 238 |
| #3 | Coefeet | 33% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ghosly | 62% | 78 |
| #2 | Yoisaki Kanade | 50% | 238 |
| #3 | Coefeet | 33% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yoisaki Kanade | 14 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | Ghosly | 8 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | Coefeet | 2 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yoisaki Kanade | 500 | 0.10 | 12 min |
| #2 | Ghosly | 328 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #3 | Coefeet | 54 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ghosly | +2.49 | 45 | 68 |
| #2 | Miguemakosh | +1.61 | 26 | 54 |
| #3 | Yoisaki Kanade | -2.38 | 36 | 48 |
| #4 | Coefeet | -2.66 | 26 | 43 |





