








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 440 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2144 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,300 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1633 | 18% |
| Smokes | 2834 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1907 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 2926 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $516,583 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 62 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hampi. | 70% | 33 |
| #2 | Beni | 62% | 13 |
| #3 | Zhaoyr | 60% | 92 |
| #4 | gelerkehhh | 59% | 103 |
| #5 | csicsak | 58% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | funny | 16 | 0.0147 |
| #2 | Zhaoyr | 8 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Tomay. | 7 | 0.0068 |
| #4 | Rush | 4 | 0.0043 |
| #5 | hampi. | 3 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rush | 217 | 0.23 | 4 min |
| #2 | Zhaoyr | 197 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #3 | hampi. | 128 | 0.22 | 3 min |
| #4 | gelerkehhh | 124 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | funny | 91 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dud | +4.93 | 75 | 60 |
| #2 | hampi. | +4.88 | 90 | 56 |
| #3 | Beni | +1.15 | 82 | 61 |
| #4 | funny | +0.90 | 60 | 59 |
| #5 | Zhaoyr | +0.83 | 70 | 45 |





