








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1201 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 161 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 114 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Premier | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




42 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5184 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,433 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1654 | 26% |
| Smokes | 2120 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 993 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1666 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $616,103 of utility $58 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 830 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #10 | J4KOB | 55% | 88 |
| #11 | reforce | 53% | 99 |
| #12 | Senso | 50% | 74 |
| #13 | dog1ess | 47% | 34 |
| #14 | aspect | 40% | 40 |





