








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 175 matches | ||
| Faceit | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2420 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,070 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 869 | 17% |
| Smokes | 1351 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1287 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1563 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,121,085 of utility $218 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 203 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | carlos | 54% | 184 |
| #2 | skepje' | 52% | 99 |
| #3 | Glls | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | carlos | 54% | 184 |
| #2 | skepje' | 52% | 99 |
| #3 | Glls | 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | carlos | 41 | 0.0107 |
| #2 | skepje' | 13 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | carlos | 542 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #2 | skepje' | 207 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #3 | Glls | 32 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | carlos | +1.40 | 85 | 61 |
| #2 | Glls | -0.17 | 75 | 52 |
| #3 | ᠌ ??? | -0.21 | 68 | 42 |
| #4 | skepje' | -1.52 | 70 | 62 |





