








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 630 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 250 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 67 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2809 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,325 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2270 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2749 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3506 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 2800 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $981,883 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 599 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seksi betmen | 17 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | AIejandro | 9 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | LonelyDeath | 7 | 0.0034 |
| #4 | whatTheDawgDoin' | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | hannibally | 5 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seksi betmen | 309 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #2 | whatTheDawgDoin' | 223 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| #3 | LonelyDeath | 105 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | hannibally | 95 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #5 | AIejandro | 52 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | whatTheDawgDoin' | +2.53 | 40 | 61 |
| #2 | LonelyDeath | +1.03 | 71 | 47 |
| #3 | AIejandro | +0.82 | 72 | 43 |
| #4 | Petrusil | +0.71 | 70 | 52 |
| #5 | hannibally | +0.12 | 37 | 53 |





