








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 460 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 213 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3645 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,004 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6354 | 29% |
| Smokes | 5628 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4775 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 5247 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,397,548 of utility $140 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 414 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hub | 53% | 53 |
| #2 | I got the reset | 47% | 231 |
| #3 | kev0 | 45% | 424 |
| #4 | Rotten Eggs | 45% | 372 |
| #5 | High Sky Senpai~* | 43% | 334 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | I got the reset | 47% | 231 |
| #3 | kev0 | 45% | 424 |
| #4 | Rotten Eggs | 45% | 372 |
| #5 | High Sky Senpai~* | 43% | 334 |
| #6 | Ghost | 34% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kev0 | 22 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | High Sky Senpai~* | 10 | 0.0015 |
| #3 | I got the reset | 10 | 0.0021 |
| #4 | Rotten Eggs | 9 | 0.0012 |
| #5 | hub | 1 | 0.0009 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kev0 | 1212 | 0.14 | 30 min |
| #2 | I got the reset | 605 | 0.13 | 14 min |
| #3 | Rotten Eggs | 527 | 0.07 | 14 min |
| #4 | High Sky Senpai~* | 347 | 0.05 | 9 min |
| #5 | hub | 51 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | I got the reset | +3.29 | 73 | 62 |
| #2 | kev0 | +0.96 | 32 | 61 |
| #3 | Rotten Eggs | +0.77 | 47 | 57 |
| #4 | Nuko | -0.96 | 27 | 71 |
| #5 | hub | -2.48 | 20 | 50 |





