








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 602 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 566 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5815 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,540 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6292 | 34% |
| Smokes | 3854 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 5075 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 3319 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,626,810 of utility $188 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 141 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DoodSkoot | 54% | 197 |
| #2 | Atol | 52% | 356 |
| #3 | LiLBr0methius | 51% | 444 |
| #4 | Spoegies | 48% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DoodSkoot | 54% | 197 |
| #2 | Atol | 52% | 356 |
| #3 | LiLBr0methius | 51% | 444 |
| #4 | Spoegies | 48% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Atol | 31 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | LiLBr0methius | 17 | 0.0019 |
| #3 | DoodSkoot | 17 | 0.0042 |
| #4 | Spoegies | 12 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Atol | 987 | 0.13 | 23 min |
| #2 | DoodSkoot | 396 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #3 | Spoegies | 220 | 0.05 | 5 min |
| #4 | LiLBr0methius | 51 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LiLBr0methius | +2.04 | 70 | 18 |
| #2 | Atol | +1.63 | 62 | 50 |
| #3 | DoodSkoot | +0.90 | 59 | 63 |
| #4 | oh-my-sack | -1.80 | 71 | 65 |
| #5 | Spoegies | -1.87 | 52 | 55 |





