








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1296 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 749 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 88 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 38 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 44 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




156 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7150 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 48,782 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 13983 | 29% |
| Smokes | 11963 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 12132 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 10704 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,132,415 of utility $58 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1391 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mirjamikene | 53% | 432 |
| #2 | BOT midagi | 50% | 225 |
| #3 | marekjarve | 49% | 121 |
| #4 | uthman Ighbin | 47% | 103 |
| #5 | Styx | 46% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mirjamikene | 38 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | BOT midagi | 17 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | uthman Ighbin | 12 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | raave | 10 | 0.0092 |
| #5 | marekjarve | 5 | 0.0019 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | raave | +2.78 | 56 | 55 |
| #2 | MR.säga the kala | +1.31 | 58 | 81 |
| #3 | BOT midagi | -0.46 | 48 | 33 |
| #4 | marekjarve | -0.53 | 32 | 16 |
| #5 | Styx | -0.89 | 39 | 38 |





