








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 469 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 52 matches | ||
| Faceit | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1080 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,957 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 327 | 17% |
| Smokes | 482 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 520 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 628 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $677,450 of utility $260 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 77 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stnapyldaed | 93% | 15 |
| #2 | storm | 76% | 34 |
| #3 | ... | 73% | 66 |
| #4 | maxhansson | 71% | 105 |
| #5 | Ssp | 58% | 55 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ... | +5.90 | 76 | 69 |
| #2 | maxhansson | +3.00 | 69 | 42 |
| #3 | stnapyldaed | +2.86 | 67 | 37 |
| #4 | Jake ツ | -0.44 | 52 | 43 |
| #5 | storm | -0.81 | 54 | 58 |





