








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 523 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 291 matches | ||
| Faceit | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4131 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,589 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3728 | 24% |
| Smokes | 6147 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 1810 | 12% |
| Molotovs | 3904 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,701,425 of utility $163 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 103 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | endieZ | 54% | 28 |
| #2 | Turtle | 49% | 45 |
| #3 | Ongo Gablogian | 49% | 70 |
| #4 | compa | 46% | 41 |
| #5 | Jinjer | 46% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Ongo Gablogian | 49% | 70 |
| #4 | compa | 46% | 41 |
| #5 | Jinjer | 46% | 26 |
| #6 | goku marine ✝☪✡ | 46% | 70 |
| #7 | fork | 45% | 38 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | goku marine ✝☪✡ | 10 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | endieZ | 5 | 0.0091 |
| #3 | Ongo Gablogian | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Jinjer | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | Turtle | 1 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | goku marine ✝☪✡ | 264 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #2 | fork | 160 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #3 | Turtle | 112 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | compa | 97 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| #5 | Ongo Gablogian | 80 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | endieZ | +3.33 | 57 | 58 |
| #2 | Ongo Gablogian | +1.82 | 77 | 45 |
| #3 | compa | +1.10 | 73 | 57 |
| #4 | fork | +0.72 | 80 | 60 |
| #5 | Veni | +0.40 | 68 | 54 |





