








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 34 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 83 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
581 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,337 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 489 | 37% |
| Smokes | 426 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 189 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 233 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $155,084 of utility $56 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jaras g4skins | 53% | 118 |
| #2 | seabucket_ | 52% | 87 |
| #3 | Ichigo | 51% | 136 |
| #4 | big man | 50% | 103 |
| #5 | purchawa | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | big man | 291 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #2 | Ichigo | 189 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #3 | Jaras g4skins | 159 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | seabucket_ | 79 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| #5 | purchawa | 6 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | purchawa | +5.28 | 70 | 20 |
| #2 | Jaras g4skins | +4.80 | 45 | 37 |
| #3 | Ichigo | +1.77 | 59 | 34 |
| #4 | seabucket_ | -1.70 | 33 | 19 |
| #5 | Shadow | -2.93 | 26 | 21 |





