








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 110 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 248 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




26 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3257 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,876 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4900 | 41% |
| Smokes | 1880 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 2806 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2290 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $716,754 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 362 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wu-Tang Clang | 64% | 36 |
| #2 | cJR_McPyro | 57% | 30 |
| #3 | Jordan | 51% | 133 |
| #4 | Stormie | 51% | 128 |
| #5 | Whirlpool Power Clean Pro | 50% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Stormie | 296 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #2 | filip | 265 | 0.21 | 7 min |
| #3 | Jordan | 261 | 0.10 | 5 min |
| #4 | adalia | 173 | 0.48 | 4 min |
| #5 | BiPlane | 116 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gr0wler | +2.74 | 65 | 52 |
| #2 | filip | +2.64 | 62 | 63 |
| #3 | gromit | +1.65 | 50 | 67 |
| #4 | Jordan | +1.64 | 60 | 48 |
| #5 | Wu-Tang Clang | +0.95 | 70 | 48 |





