








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1027 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 589 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 94 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6473 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,684 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3407 | 23% |
| Smokes | 3413 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 4855 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 3009 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,541,534 of utility $179 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1169 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fishie | 53% | 47 |
| #2 | paz | 52% | 89 |
| #3 | crazed man | 48% | 102 |
| #4 | coding | 48% | 410 |
| #5 | Kitten | 48% | 279 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kitten | 1521 | 0.25 | 35 min |
| #2 | coding | 975 | 0.11 | 22 min |
| #3 | crazed man | 257 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | Skyline | 208 | 0.26 | 5 min |
| #5 | paz | 171 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | paz | +4.16 | 68 | 63 |
| #2 | crazed man | +2.57 | 67 | 56 |
| #3 | Fishie | +1.26 | 61 | 59 |
| #4 | coding | +0.70 | 61 | 63 |
| #5 | Skyline | +0.07 | 69 | 72 |





