










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 619 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 347 matches | ||
| Faceit | 115 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5637 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,226 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7310 | 29% |
| Smokes | 7067 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3984 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 6865 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,936,248 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1134 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TurnedUpSideDown | 61% | 36 |
| #2 | deejay | 58% | 43 |
| #3 | solitude | 56% | 241 |
| #4 | SulamiWizard | 56% | 326 |
| #5 | pk backthrow | 54% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | SulamiWizard | 56% | 326 |
| #5 | pk backthrow | 54% | 90 |
| #6 | Mvv. Anna | 54% | 54 |
| #7 | fusion | 53% | 76 |
| #8 | Walter Brown | 51% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SulamiWizard | 6 | 0.0009 |
| #2 | Walter Brown | 6 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | deejay | 6 | 0.0069 |
| #4 | fusion | 4 | 0.0024 |
| #5 | pk backthrow | 3 | 0.0016 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SulamiWizard | 1837 | 0.26 | 57 min |
| #2 | solitude | 914 | 0.18 | 24 min |
| #3 | pk backthrow | 258 | 0.13 | 7 min |
| #4 | deejay | 249 | 0.29 | 5 min |
| #5 | fusion | 194 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SulamiWizard | +3.14 | 77 | 80 |
| #2 | deejay | +2.88 | 66 | 62 |
| #3 | fusion | +0.89 | 64 | 59 |
| #4 | Walter Brown | +0.28 | 79 | 48 |
| #5 | solitude | -0.00 | 58 | 70 |





