










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 85 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2250 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,390 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 471 | 34% |
| Smokes | 189 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 529 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 201 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,112,665 of utility $243 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 490 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | GOD GAMING WARLORD | 64% | 28 |
| #4 | Jan | 57% | 37 |
| #5 | Mochi | 55% | 33 |
| #6 | BigHeadHenry85763 | 51% | 220 |
| #7 | Fitzy | 45% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigHeadHenry85763 | 50 | 0.0115 |
| #2 | Jan | 12 | 0.0167 |
| #3 | GOD GAMING WARLORD | 9 | 0.0167 |
| #4 | Fitzy | 6 | 0.0103 |
| #5 | Mochi | 5 | 0.0078 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BigHeadHenry85763 | 506 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #2 | Fitzy | 151 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| #3 | Mochi | 95 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | #dryhumping4life | 68 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #5 | GOD GAMING WARLORD | 65 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GOD GAMING WARLORD | +3.31 | 83 | 56 |
| #2 | BigHeadHenry85763 | +2.68 | 71 | 48 |
| #3 | #dryhumping4life | +2.59 | 86 | 61 |
| #4 | Jan | +2.34 | 96 | 26 |
| #5 | Mochi | +2.28 | 87 | 45 |





