








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 625 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 118 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 84 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 37 matches | ||
| Wingman | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 25 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




108 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5256 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,768 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2819 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2693 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 2682 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 3574 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,182,179 of utility $200 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 691 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | #dryhumping4life | 67% | 85 |
| #3 | GOD GAMING WARLORD | 60% | 140 |
| #4 | Jan | 59% | 180 |
| #5 | Jack | 51% | 220 |
| #6 | Mochi | 48% | 155 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jan | 58 | 0.0167 |
| #2 | GOD GAMING WARLORD | 40 | 0.0142 |
| #3 | #dryhumping4life | 17 | 0.0101 |
| #4 | Mochi | 9 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | Jack | 6 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GOD GAMING WARLORD | 404 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #2 | Mochi | 329 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | #dryhumping4life | 253 | 0.15 | 6 min |
| #4 | Jack | 169 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | Jan | 161 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GOD GAMING WARLORD | +2.70 | 82 | 61 |
| #2 | Jan | +2.38 | 93 | 34 |
| #3 | BigHeadHenry85763 | +1.36 | 67 | 46 |
| #4 | Mochi | +0.69 | 81 | 48 |
| #5 | #dryhumping4life | +0.26 | 79 | 55 |





