








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 183 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1037 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,067 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 798 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1244 | 41% |
| HE Grenades | 288 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 737 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $415,479 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 174 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mike | 64% | 11 |
| #2 | ☬Mini Rain☬ | 58% | 88 |
| #3 | exonerated | 54% | 95 |
| #4 | Emlow | 49% | 70 |
| #5 | .pablo | 48% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ☬Mini Rain☬ | 58% | 88 |
| #3 | exonerated | 54% | 95 |
| #4 | Emlow | 49% | 70 |
| #5 | .pablo | 48% | 29 |
| #6 | SwipZy | 48% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | exonerated | 10 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | ☬Mini Rain☬ | 9 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | Emlow | 8 | 0.0054 |
| #4 | .pablo | 4 | 0.0066 |
| #5 | SwipZy | 2 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SwipZy | 168 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #2 | ☬Mini Rain☬ | 129 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #3 | Emlow | 122 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| #4 | .pablo | 73 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | exonerated | 66 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | exonerated | +2.27 | 89 | 35 |
| #2 | Emlow | +0.56 | 82 | 56 |
| #3 | Rimidie | -0.21 | 64 | 48 |
| #4 | ☬Mini Rain☬ | -0.52 | 85 | 60 |
| #5 | .pablo | -0.79 | 78 | 59 |





