








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 21 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 466 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5036 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,657 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2193 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2797 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2598 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 3069 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $950,653 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tendies | 56% | 39 |
| #2 | Me say | 56% | 138 |
| #3 | S | 54% | 375 |
| #4 | rasco | 54% | 153 |
| #5 | Rythio | 48% | 143 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tendies | 56% | 39 |
| #2 | Me say | 56% | 138 |
| #3 | S | 54% | 375 |
| #4 | rasco | 54% | 153 |
| #5 | Rythio | 48% | 143 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | S | 18 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Rythio | 11 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | rasco | 7 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Me say | 5 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Tendies | 1 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Me say | 413 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #2 | Rythio | 317 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #3 | S | 247 | 0.03 | 6 min |
| #4 | rasco | 140 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #5 | Tendies | 109 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rythio | +0.78 | 82 | 61 |
| #2 | dope | +0.72 | 70 | 47 |
| #3 | S | +0.25 | 69 | 39 |
| #4 | rasco | +0.14 | 78 | 42 |
| #5 | Tendies | +0.13 | 69 | 58 |





