








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 421 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 45 matches | ||
| Wingman | 36 matches | ||
| Faceit | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3410 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,337 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1770 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2410 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2280 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1877 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $486,183 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 706 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | marlboro | 22 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | sminnna | 12 | 0.0092 |
| #3 | csubee | 7 | 0.0080 |
| #4 | tekarukite | 7 | 0.0117 |
| #5 | Anø | 4 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | marlboro | 806 | 0.21 | 17 min |
| #2 | tekarukite | 119 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | sminnna | 108 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #4 | csubee | 98 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #5 | Anø | 83 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anø | +3.13 | 67 | 62 |
| #2 | sminnna | +2.01 | 77 | 54 |
| #3 | 111 | +1.66 | 74 | 57 |
| #4 | marlboro | +0.70 | 64 | 68 |
| #5 | csubee | -0.29 | 81 | 60 |





